If there is one thing I can boast about, it is that I am weak.  No matter how hard I try, no matter how hard I pray, I still sin.  Sure, sin doesn’t usually control me like it used to, and overall sin in my life has been reduced but it is still there.  But I have noticed something interesting in my life.  When I am really seeking God and still struggling with sin in my life, God shines the brightest.  It’s at these times of weakness that God seems to take control and work through me the most. 

For example when I wrote Winning through a Loss, despite seeking God, I struggled mightily with sin.  When I wrote Demonic Deception, I was arguably the closest to God I have ever been, yet I still struggled.  Although I am not writing a book right now, God has given me much to say through this blog.  But it seems the words really didn’t start flowing until I started struggling more with sin.  It’s not that I want to sin…I hate it.  But when I am struggling, I know that God will work mightily through me if I am earnestly and sincerely still seeking Him.  I often ask God to take these sins from me, yet they remain.

I know I am not alone with my struggle with sin.  Even the apostle Paul wrote about his struggles and in 2 Corinthians 12:9, we get to hear what God says to him when he asks God to take them from him.  "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."  What an amazing statement from God.  If we love Him with all our hearts, we don’t have to be perfect.  In fact, He will do amazing things through our imperfections.  All He asks for is a humble heart that seeks Him; Very simple if you think about it.  Paul mentions the simplicity of Christ in 2 Corinthians 11:3.

Knowing what God wants, it’s not hard to see or understand one way satan will attack us.  He will try to strip us of our humility and give us a desire to be ‘God like,’ the exact same desire that caused him to fall.  A ‘God like’ life and attitude revolves around what I did and how good I am.  This attitude is really obvious in some situations and not so obvious in others.  Would you believe many Christians have this attitude at times and don’t even know it?  I know I struggle with it sometimes.  

When we sin, most often Christians feel guilt, shame, and ultimately defeated.  One small sin can cause a cascade of more sins that ultimately leads to a drifting from God.  But why is this?  Often after we sin, thoughts start flooding our minds like, “I am not good enough or why am I so pathetic?”  Feelings of low self-worth and disappointment can cause a distance between you and God.  As long as we have a ‘God like’ attitude, we will stay trapped in a meaningless, powerless, depressing pit and that is right where satan wants us to stay. 

You might be asking, you mean I can feel like I am a failure and have a ‘God like’ attitude at the same time?  Absolutely!  Our relationship with God is not about our own power or strength.  It’s not about what you did or didn’t do.  If you have this attitude, you completely negate the power of the cross.  Jesus tells us in John 5:24 “Very truly I tell you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be judged but has crossed over from death to life.”  Satan has already been defeated.  Don’t believe his lies that you are not good enough.

The truth is we are all weak.  We desperately need God because of this weakness.    If we humbly come before God begging and pleading for mercy, we know God sees us as ‘good enough’ because of what Jesus did.  We know that at our weakest, God’s power will be upon us. 

Does this give us a free ticket to sin?  Of course not.  No one that loves God wants to sin.  What it does do is free us from being drug into that powerless pit.  When we sin, it’s a momentary lapse of judgment.  It doesn’t change who we are or the inheritance we will receive.  So I will keep boasting about my weakness.  I am not good enough.  I fail people.  I fail God.  Despite my faults, I will keep seeking Him.  And despite my faults and failures, God will use me in mighty ways.  The same power that raised Jesus from the dead lives in all believers, but that power is useless if we keep it to ourselves.  Share what you have been given!  Give hope to those around you!

2 Corinthians 12:10 “Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.”

This past fall I was at my two boy’s football game when one of my daughters asked me, “What are we going to do about supper?”  The boys were playing on a Sunday because they were in their playoffs and the clock was getting closer to 4:30 all the time.  We had to be at church at 4:30 for the youth church service and worship team practice and my daughter knew I wouldn’t want to be cooking at 8:30 that night after we got home.  As it got later, I started to get stressed out because I knew we wouldn’t even make it to church on time.

A few weeks earlier my oldest boy had made a bet with one of his teammate’s dads.  The dad owned a pizza shop in town that made some of the largest pizzas these eyes have ever seen.  The bet was if my boy scored three touchdowns in a game, he would be given a large pizza with whatever toppings he wanted.   Of course, ever since the deal was struck it was all the boys would talk about.  I was sure to clarify that since one of the boys was blocking for the one running, they had to split the pizza 50/50.

The game finally ended in victory around 4:20 but we would still need another 20 minutes to make it to the church.  I quickly sent the boys into the restroom so they could change clothes.  As I waited outside for them to finish, the dad that had made the bet walked 100 feet or so out of his way to talk to me.  “So what kind of pizza do you guys like?” he asked.  About this time, my oldest son came out of the restroom.  “What kind of pizza do you want?” I asked him.  “But I didn’t score three touchdowns.  I only scored two,” he said with a confused smile on his face.  “I know,” the kind man said, “but they aren’t going to leave you in long enough to score 3.  I am going to give you guys two pizzas.  What time do you want them ready?”  I told him that we were leaving for church right then and we would be done around 8:15.  “OK,” he said, “I will have them ready at 8:15.”  We all sincerely thanked him and quickly left for church.

After church, I went into the pizza shop and told the man behind the counter that the owner said there would be two pizzas ready for us when we came in.  He turned around, wrapped his arms around the two mammoth boxes, and then handed them to me with a smile.  The boys were full of joy, laughing and talking the whole way home as the two pizza boxes filled the passenger seat, and the smell of melted mozzarella filled the air.

The kids ate until they were stuffed and we ended up eating on that pizza for the next two nights.  We were in need, and God had provided.  To make the story even more special, my wife had left Sunday morning for a mini trip with some friends.  Because of this generous gift, and because the man gave us 2 pizzas instead of 1, I never had to cook supper the whole time she was gone. 

God is always at work.  He is always speaking to our hearts.  Too often we have too much going on in our minds to hear what is being spoken in our hearts.  There is nothing wrong with working hard and it’s essential that we work hard for God.  But being extra busy to squeeze out a little more money or a little more fun in life is wrong.  Worldly busyness is an antagonist to Godliness. 

Do you think it was just dumb luck that the man changed his gift from 1 pizza to 2?  Do you think it was just a random day ‘he’ decided to give so generously?  Whether he knew it or not, God spoke to him and he listened.  God is speaking to you.  Are you too busy to hear Him?  Will you sacrifice ‘play’ time to have more God time?               

Last week while reading in Galatians I heard a voice that shouted,” you need to write about what you are reading.”  It wasn’t an audible voice but I was convinced God wanted me to share.  I was so convinced that I grabbed a pen and jotted down a couple of the verses that were screaming at me.  Later that day a friend ‘randomly’ shared a verse with me from Romans.  It just so happens that the verse he shared said almost word for word the verses I had written down from Galatians.  If I had any hesitation to share, it was erased right then.

We are all a messed up people.  No matter how hard I try, no matter how much I ask God to help me not make bonehead mistakes, I still make them.  It can be extremely frustrating at times when your heart wants one thing yet you do something completely different.  In my past, making one dumb choice would have led to 2, then 3, then 5 dozen…in one day.  I would wind up in a huge, deep rut and climbing out was difficult to say the least. 

Not long ago, God opened my eyes to something that I hadn’t seen, or at least hadn’t paid much attention to.  Everyone was just like me.  No matter how ‘good’ someone appeared on the outside, they were messed up just like me.  Sure, people can have different motives for doing what they do and some seemingly don’t care about the choices they make, but no one, not one, is faultless.  No matter how hard we try to not mess up, we mess up.

If we are all messed up and we all fail God at times, why did Jesus tell people to be perfect?  (Matthew 5:48)  Surely Jesus knows how messed up I am.  Surely He knows that I will never live up to this.  The truth is this verse, along with satan’s lies, kept me in my deep rut for most of my life.  Every time I failed God, satan would whisper in my ear, “You are a failure.  You aren’t really saved.  You don’t even have the Holy Spirit.  How could you sin if you have God’s spirit inside you?”  It caused so much confusion in my life, God’s spirit, the power that lives inside me, was reduced to just existing, just patiently waiting.

Even though I lived so much of my life like this, even though I was a horrible sinner, God continued nudging me.  He continued to give me a hunger for His word.  As I studied more and more, I began to see the ‘complete’ picture.  I began to understand why Paul seemingly contradicted Jesus when he said in Romans 3:10 “There is no one righteous, not even one;” When we understand that we are not perfect and that God loves us, despite our failures, it frees us to live the life He intended for us.  Satan can whisper whatever he wants, I no longer listen.  I know the truth and the truth sets me free.

So back to the question, why did Jesus tell us to be perfect?  There are a couple answers to the question.  First, we are to hunger for perfection.  Jesus said in Matthew 5:6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.”  We are to give everything we have to please God.  Even though we sometimes fall, we must keep getting back up.  We must be relentless in our pursuit of obeying the creator.  I am not sure there is a better verse to sum it up as this one.  Romans 5:19 “For just as through the disobedience of the one man the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous.”  Because of Adam, we are all sinners.  Because of what Jesus did for us, many will be made right with God if we follow Him.

The other answer to the question is through love.  If we truly have faith and love for God, our faith and love for God will be expressed through our love for others (Galatians 5:6)  What is the greatest commandment for us?  What is most important to God?    Matthew 22:36-40 “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”  Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’  All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”  Paul reiterates this same thought in Galatians 5:14 “For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”  Even though we are sinners, we will be made right with God if we follow Jesus.  There is no amount of good deeds we can do to ever be made right.  There is no amount of will power or trying that will make us perfect.  It’s about our hearts.  It’s about what Jesus already did.
 
When satan whispers in your ear that you are loser when you stumble, don’t listen.  When he tells you that God can’t possibly love you because you are not good enough, ignore him.  He has already lost and he knows it.  The only thing he can do is try to convince you of his lies and in doing so weaken your relationship with God. 

We can’t be perfect but we must try to be.  We must love God and believe in Him with all our hearts and we must love people.  God is going to put people in your lives this week that need help.  They may be hungry for food or they may be hungry for the truth.  God is watching what you do.  Will you choose to give them hope or will you choose to ignore them?  Every believer will mess up but not every believer will choose to love.  Even demons believe in God and we know their eternal destination.  If we want to spend eternity in the presence of the almighty God we must choose love. What do you choose?  1 Peter 4:8   “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”

God gave me this message when a friend said one seemingly 'meaningless' sentence to me the other day.  God showed me it wasn't meaningless at all.  Amazing our God is!!

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Many argue that we can’t prove God exists.  While undeniable, clear, hard proof evidence may not exist because that is how God wants it, we can see ‘proof’ in God’s creation.  In His creation, God often uses symbolism to those that look for it.  In my latest book I show one example of this symbolism:


“The moon on its own can produce no light.  Unlike a star, it has no energy source.  The light we see is only a reflection from the sun.  The more we see of the moon the brighter the light gets.  This light is further brightened when the sun, the light source, gets close to being in line with the observer.  As the phases change and we see less and less of the moon, the night becomes darker and darker until you can’t see anything without a manmade light source.

Before Jesus came to save us, the world was full of darkness.  In John 9:5 Jesus said, “While I am in the world, I am the light of the world.”  Jesus is the son of God but He is also like the sun.  Revelation 21:23 says that heaven has no need for a sun or a moon because the glory of God gives it light.
We are like the moon.  By ourselves we are full of darkness, hopelessness, and despair.  We are a lifeless rock.  With Jesus as our light source, we become light because we reflect His light.  The more visible we become to the world, the brighter that light will get.  As we get more in line with God, the light will get even brighter.”


Another example of this symbolism may be in a place you have never thought of.  When the lights go out, they come out.  They are known and feared far and wide.  They can cause urinary tract infections, digestive problems, and even sepsis.  They are responsible for hundreds of allergens that can lead to-many health problems including asthma attacks among asthmatics.  They are cockroaches.
 
I know what you are thinking.  God used symbolism when he created Cockroaches?  Let me explain.  Cockroaches come out at night.  By definition they are nocturnal.  I am yet to find any scientific data to show that cockroaches are good for anything. Well anything other than causing pain, sickness, and sometimes even death. 

If you turn the lights on, cockroaches will run and hide.  With light, they are no longer hidden.  They are shamefully exposed for all to see.  As long as there are shadows to hide in, you will hardly ever see a cockroach even though they are still at work.  But when they become infested, or when the light in the room starts to dim, more and more will become visible. 





In John 8:12 Jesus talks about the light. “Then Jesus again spoke to them, saying, "I am the Light of the world; he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life."  And then again in Matthew 5:14 He repeats this same thought when talking with His believers.  “You are the light of the world.”  It is clear that God expects something from believers when they become Christians.  They are to shine their light. 

When we chase after God with all of our hearts and tell others about Him, our light shines brighter.  When we serve God by serving others, our light shines brighter.  When we care more about God and pleasing Him than pleasing ourselves, our light will shine brighter.  This light will cause the ‘cockroaches’ of the world to run and hide because they aren’t comfortable in the light.  John 3:20 “Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed.”  To keep evil in the shadows we must shine brighter. 

Is it any wonder that the world keeps getting more evil by the day as more and more fall away from God?  This is not the time to conserve energy.  This is not the time to dim our lights.  It’s time we get all the lights on in the house despite what the energy bill could cost us.  There will be a much higher cost if we do nothing.  Doing nothing is not an option.
 
James 2:14-17 “What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them?  Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food.  If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it?  In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.”

I was a teenage boy and I was head over heels in love…at least I thought I was.  We talked on the phone a time or two and we met at a track meet where she was throwing the shot put.  When we met shortly after she competed in her event, she was all smiles.  Despite me considering her out of my league, she was kind and considerate and her warmth and gentleness towards me impacted me greatly.  At a time in my life when I felt rejected by pretty much every member of the opposite sex, she was the lone bright spot that made me feel self-worth.  Not long after, I started dating another girl, my first real girlfriend I had ever had.  My crush on the first girl was gone but I would never be the same again.   

Today my heart is heavy.  My first crush as a teenage boy is living her last days on earth.  The once lively and energetic woman has been reduced to lying in a bed hooked up to an IV.  The cancer has wrecked her body.  She hangs onto life by a thread. 

When something like this happens we often ask the question why.  Why would God allow something so awful to happen to someone so beautiful?  Why would God take a believer that was shining a light for Him so brightly?  The verses in Isaiah 55:8-9 tell us why we don’t understand.  “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.  “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”   

Through my own experiences with the tragic loss of my wife Kari in 2006, I have seen firsthand how God can take something tremendously painful and ugly and make it breathtakingly beautiful.  My wife Kari loved to help people more than anything in the world.  It brought her great joy to help someone in need.  Little did she know that through her death, her ability to help people would increase dramatically.  As much as she loved to help people, if she could have known what kind of impact she would have on people through her death, I have no doubt she would have been honored to offer her life for so many if she would have had the choice.

I am certain that my old friend with cancer and her husband will impact people mightily throughout the world.  I am certain that they already have.  They have shown incredible faith despite their circumstances and that incredible faith is on display for the whole world to see.  You see, even though this couple may act like it, they are not your normal neighbors next door.  They are the country music duo Joey and Rory.

In what can only be described as a God thing, in 2012 Joey and Rory recorded, ‘When I’m Gone,” a song that was written by Sandy Lawrence as she cared for her dying mother.  In the video, Joey sings the song as if she is dying and Rory her husband, plays the part of the grieving spouse.  Rory hated the idea of casting them in those roles because he didn’t want to think about something so heartbreaking but he felt it was the right thing to do.  Today through his heartache and the terrible pain of watching his wife die, he considers the video a gift.  I consider knowing Joey, even if for ever so briefly, a gift.

We cross paths with many hurting people every day but we don’t always know everyone’s stories.  If you ask how someone is doing most likely they will say they are OK but many times they are not.  Sometimes we like to keep our distance from those that are hurting because we don’t want to get messy.  We don’t want to get drug down. 

What if we knew a simple smile or a word of encouragement could change someone’s life?  Would we go out of our way to help someone if we knew it would make a difference?  What if we knew that the person driving slow in front of us had just come from the funeral of their child and they couldn’t see the road ahead of them because of the tears in their eyes?  Would we still get angry that we were going to be home two minutes later than normal?     
  
We are only given so many chances to help people.  We never know when our last day will be.  Live every day like it is your last.  Give everything you have every day you are given.  Give everything for God.

I cautiously share this message.  This message isn’t about me or anything I did.  I share this story to give hope.  I share this story to glorify God.  God is always watching.  God loves us so very much.  If you seek Him, you will find Him.   
Several years ago I had an ex-girlfriend send me a friend request on Facebook.  Out of respect for my wife I declined the request and sent her a message wishing her well.  A few weeks ago after praying for God to show me people I could help, I had an overwhelming desire to send her a friend request on Facebook.  I hadn’t honestly thought of her for years so this struck me as very odd.  Like I do so many times, I kind of ignored this tugging not really sure why I had this random desire.  A few days later I again had this same strange desire.  Thinking that the desire must be from God, I sent her a friend request that day.
Later that day, I was blown away to find out that she had been through quite a lot in the last six months including losing her 15 year old nephew in an accident.  She told me she was overwhelmed and confused, and that she had just recently started attending church.  I could tell she was really hurting.  When she asked why I was sending her a friend request now, I told her the story.  I told her I did it because I felt God wanted me to.  She messaged me back, “I am just sitting here crying. A Lot of things keep happening that make no sense.  I'm sitting here Just blown away!” 
A few days later she read my first book and sent me another message that read, “I can't understand or explain how you knew to reach out and how your book has helped me besides the power of God.”   Matthew 5:4 “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”  For those that believe, never forget the power that lives inside you.  Romans 8:11 “And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you…” One person can make a difference.  You can make a difference.

God put something on my heart a few weeks ago and I ignored it.  I always try to listen but I wasn’t sure what He was trying to say to me.  Again today, I felt this same tugging at my heart.  This tugging was the need to share something from my first book, Winning through a Loss.  Interestingly, when I opened the file on my computer to my first book and quickly scrolled down to what I felt I was supposed to share, I ended up on the exact page I was looking for.  Coincidence?  I think not. 

“God clearly created a burning desire in all of us to have dreams. Living without dreams, is akin to the feather drifting in the wind. You don’t have any control over where you are going and you don’t know where you will end up. A life with no dreams and no purpose is no life at all. Most of us have had dreams since we were little children. We have big plans for life and then life happens to us. Starting in childhood, daily we are bombarded with little attacks on us. These attacks could be a bad choice of words by a parent or it could be a classmate picking on us at school. At the time, we don’t give these interactions much thought, but over time these negative attacks start wearing on us and they change who we are.”

“As a child, we thought anything was possible. As the years go by, we start losing confidence and we start to gain fear. We lose interest in our dreams because we feel they are so out of reach and so unattainable. We start just going through the motions of life. We look forward to our favorite episodes of reality TV and our dreams are reduced to desperately hoping we someday win the lottery.”
 
We were all created to live a life filled with peace, hope, love, and joy but we must choose it.  We must not live for today or live in the past, but we must live for the future.  This life, this short time our bodies exist, is our test.  During this test we will be tempted.  We will be attacked.  We will be damaged.  There is no escaping the pain and suffering but there is hope.  This hope enables us to live like children again regardless of what has happened to us. 

Have you ever noticed how much faith and humility children can have?  No matter how old you are and no matter how messy your life is now, you can live like that again.  We must live like that.  Matthew 18:3  “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven”

I read a sign in my gym the other day and I was reminded of that sign when I read something similar yesterday online.  The sign at the gym was supposed to be ‘motivational’ as the heading over the words that followed read ‘motivational’.  What were these passion filled motivational words??  “PUT YOURSELF FIRST!!”  Without even thinking about what was written I stood in the gym thinking to myself if you need to be told that what you are about to read is motivational it may be lacking in content just a bit. 

As I thought about the wise words a bit more I couldn’t help but shake my head.  It reminded me of something I witnessed at this same gym I attend.  A guy that was working out noticed that another man working out there needed new shoes desperately.  Every time this fellow took a step the whole bottom of his shoe would fold backwards…it must have been ready to come off at any moment.  The man that noticed the man with the worn shoes was so moved he walked over to him and struck up a conversation.  The man with the worn shoes randomly told the stranger how he had always put other people first but he wasn’t going to any longer.  He was going to put himself first. 

The men went back to working out for a few minutes before the sincere man couldn’t help but walk up to him again.  “I don’t mean to be disrespectful,” the caring man said, “but do you have the money to buy new shoes?”  The man with the broken shoes told him he got paid the next day and that he and his wife were going to buy new shoes with the money. 

The two men went back to working out but I could tell that even though the kind man didn’t physically give the other man anything, it had affected the man to his core.  One random stranger putting another random stranger first…that is truly motivational.  The world will always try to convince you the opposite is true but we were not made to please ourselves.  We were made to love, to give, and to serve.  When we do these three things, we won’t be looking for motivation.  We will be motivating others.