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WHEN GOD SPEAKS TO MY HEART, I WRITE

LOVE ALWAYS TRUSTS

11/12/2017

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The last few months I have been crying out to God with many prayers but one prayer in particular has weighed extra heavy on my heart.  I have begged God over and over again to answer this one prayer.  On October 18th at 4am He did.  It’s not that anything changed on that morning but God spoke to me so clearly I went to work and wrote down His answer.  From that moment on a great peace about this situation came over me.  I no longer worried and I no longer carried the burden. 
 
As days turned into weeks I felt my patience beginning to be tested.  I now started asking God to hurry up and do what I already knew He would.  I began pleading with Him daily about this.  And just as clear as the first time HE spoke to me about my request, He did again a few days ago…
 
I was sitting in my tree stand on a chilly November morning when I saw the buck walk out of the woods into the clearing I had made several years ago.  I stood in my stand and turned to my left to wait for him as he walked behind my tree.  I was hoping and praying he would continue in the direction he had started which would bring him into perfect shooting position.  My heart began beating faster as he made his way closer and closer.  That is when he did what all deer hunters dread, he began to sniff the air and look directly at me.  I was in an awkward position as my body was half twisted around the tree I was positioned in.  I was holding my bow in my left hand and my right ungloved hand was holding onto the bowstring.  The seconds turned into minutes as my body began to cramp and my fingers began to hurt from the freezing temperatures.  As I prayed to God for the deer to take his attention off me, I heard one word…patience.  In that moment, when I had a large buck staring at me intently, I knew I needed to write this blog. 
 
Finally the deer felt at ease enough to go about his business.  God would lead him directly past my tree stand at a mere 9 yards.  That is when I did the unthinkable.  With the deer perfectly still broadside, and with his attention someplace else, I rushed my shot.  My arrow would hit the deer but the shot was not a good one.  After many hours and many miles of hiking, the deer was never recovered. I was broken hearted.
 
The whole time I looked for my deer I prayed to God.  God please help me to know where to go.  God please help me to find this deer so it is not wasted.  At one point in the search I was on top of the world.  I had a feeling to look in a certain spot and when I approached this area I saw a large dead deer.  “Yes!!”  I said out loud.  But that momentary joy was replaced with an even greater low when I discovered that yet another buck had died on our property.  This was not my deer.  This deer was not even shot.  I was so disappointed I stayed with this deer for several minutes in disbelief.
 
The following morning I left my house to hunt another property.  I wanted to give our woods a chance to settle down after I had hiked every square inch of it looking for the deer I shot.  I practiced with my bow the evening before to be sure it was on target.  Like I had expected, I shot just fine.  The error was all mine.            
 
A few hours after first light I heard something approaching from behind my tree.  I adjusted my position in my tree stand as I waited for the deer to emerge.  But I soon realized it was not a deer at all, it was a coyote.  Like a big buck, I have dreamed of arrowing a coyote for most all of my life.  It’s a rare occurrence to see one in the woods and an even rarer occurrence to get a shot opportunity with a bow because they are always running through the woods.  As the coyote passed by my stand I pulled back my bow and made a bleat noise with my mouth.  The first noise I made the coyote ignored so I tried again only this time much louder.  When I bleated the second time, the coyote stopped in his tracks at about 15 yards.  I quickly released and the coyote bolted away.  I looked down to see my arrow sticking in the ground in front of where the coyote had stood.  I had rushed my shot again and missed.  For the second time in two days, I was devastated. 
The last few months I have been crying out to God with many prayers but one prayer in particular has weighed extra heavy on my heart.  I have begged God over and over again to answer this one prayer.  On October 18th at 4am He did.  It’s not that anything changed on that morning but God spoke to me so clearly I went to work and wrote down His answer.  From that moment on a great peace about this situation came over me.  I no longer worried and I no longer carried the burden. 
 
As days turned into weeks I felt my patience beginning to be tested.  I now started asking God to hurry up and do what I already knew He would.  I began pleading with Him daily about this.  And just as clear as the first time HE spoke to me about my request, He did again a few days ago…
 
I was sitting in my tree stand on a chilly November morning when I saw the buck walk out of the woods into the clearing I had made several years ago.  I stood in my stand and turned to my left to wait for him as he walked behind my tree.  I was hoping and praying he would continue in the direction he had started which would bring him into perfect shooting position.  My heart began beating faster as he made his way closer and closer.  That is when he did what all deer hunters dread, he began to sniff the air and look directly at me.  I was in an awkward position as my body was half twisted around the tree I was positioned in.  I was holding my bow in my left hand and my right ungloved hand was holding onto the bowstring.  The seconds turned into minutes as my body began to cramp and my fingers began to hurt from the freezing temperatures.  As I prayed to God for the deer to take his attention off me, I heard one word…patience.  In that moment, when I had a large buck staring at me intently, I knew I needed to write this blog. 
 
Finally the deer felt at ease enough to go about his business.  God would lead him directly past my tree stand at a mere 9 yards.  That is when I did the unthinkable.  With the deer perfectly still broadside, and with his attention someplace else, I rushed my shot.  My arrow would hit the deer but the shot was not a good one.  After many hours and many miles of hiking, the deer was never recovered. I was broken hearted.
 
The whole time I looked for my deer I prayed to God.  God please help me to know where to go.  God please help me to find this deer so it is not wasted.  At one point in the search I was on top of the world.  I had a feeling to look in a certain spot and when I approached this area I saw a large dead deer.  “Yes!!”  I said out loud.  But that momentary joy was replaced with an even greater low when I discovered that yet another buck had died on our property.  This was not my deer.  This deer was not even shot.  I was so disappointed I stayed with this deer for several minutes in disbelief.
 
The following morning I left my house to hunt another property.  I wanted to give our woods a chance to settle down after I had hiked every square inch of it looking for the deer I shot.  I practiced with my bow the evening before to be sure it was on target.  Like I had expected, I shot just fine.  The error was all mine.            
 
A few hours after first light I heard something approaching from behind my tree.  I adjusted my position in my tree stand as I waited for the deer to emerge.  But I soon realized it was not a deer at all, it was a coyote.  Like a big buck, I have dreamed of arrowing a coyote for most all of my life.  It’s a rare occurrence to see one in the woods and an even rarer occurrence to get a shot opportunity with a bow because they are always running through the woods.  As the coyote passed by my stand I pulled back my bow and made a bleat noise with my mouth.  The first noise I made the coyote ignored so I tried again only this time much louder.  When I bleated the second time, the coyote stopped in his tracks at about 15 yards.  I quickly released and the coyote bolted away.  I looked down to see my arrow sticking in the ground in front of where the coyote had stood.  I had rushed my shot again and missed.  For the second time in two days, I was devastated. 

Picture
HAVING THE SPIRIT OF GOD ALLOWS US TO SEE BUT ONLY DIMLY. UNTIL JESUS COMES BACK AGAIN, WE ARE TO TRUST IN HIM DESPITE OUR OWN UNDERSTANDING.
Shortly after the missed shot, I climbed down from my stand and headed to the car.  On my drive home I pleaded to God in anguish, “God why am I rushing my shots?  Why am I doing something I don’t normally do?”  No sooner had I mouthed my questions God spoke to me, “You need to be patient.”  Right away I knew this patience was far more about waiting on God’s timing then about making good shots while hunting.  God used two very painful hunting experiences to open my eyes.  I was being disciplined. 
 
Why didn’t I get it after my first missed shot?  I asked God the same question then but I heard nothing.  Not coincidently I read this verse this morning after I committed to writing this blog today.  2 Corinthians 13:1 "Every matter must be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses."  I had witnessed my lack of patience twice in two days.  God was now ready to open my eyes.
 
I knew deep within my heart God had already answered my prayers.  I knew what I had prayed about would happen.  I had quickly grown impatient with God and I was pretending to know better than the one that knows all.  Who am I to question the creator God when the right time would be?    His plan is perfect.  He is perfect.  I am not.  I am but dust.  If I am to be rescued from this life, rescued from death, and rescued from eternal punishment, I must trust the one I claim to love.  Love always trusts.         
 
 
 

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